A sad story
my 1st blog~!! shld b excited but i'm not....wasn't keen on writing all my deepest thoughts onto a website for everyone 2 exploit but tt was not until 30mins ago....i jus got a sudden urge to jus tok abt smthg n let it all out there u noe?? so e 1st thing tt came into mind was to create a blog! since i'm sydney, there's no one to tok too!! so here i m...even after all e swearing abt nv gettin one....
smthg happened todae...a new beginning...a sad beginning...i got home late n was really tired from all e quiz n project n crap in uni....din tok to my mum for 3days already....so i was all eager to jus do nothg but chat on e phone wif her so i called home....my bro picked up e phone n said "oh...u dun noe ar? gong gong passed away le...on sun nite..." at tt instant i jus started screaming n crying all tog....y din anyone tell mi?? sun nite!! its already tues today!!?!!? i tot he was lying to mi but my mum said e same thing when i called her hp....i was sorta mad cos she din say anythg abt it....i mean u had 2 freaking days to call mi!!! i noe i always call home but tt doesn't mean u can't call mi??? but apparently i told her tt i had a major quiz on mon so she din wanna tell mi cos she knew tt it would jus kill mi?? but it still hurts so bad!! M I e last to noe?? i wanna go home so bad! i wanna go home n see him 1 last time to say goodbye....y do i hav to b in sydney now!!!!!! it's so unfair!!!!!!!!!!!!!
after i hung up e phone, i jus starting crying like shit on e bed....i tot abt how i was looking online yesterday for tickets to go bac home during e 1 wk holi to see him....which is like in 2-3 more wkS!!!!!!! wat e hell!!!?!!??!? y din he wait? i dun wan him to suffer but y now!?!??! i'm so close to going home! den i decided to start writing all of tis down....since i'm here i can't really tok to anyone so at least i can write rite?? so i came online n i saw my bro's msn nick: to leave w/o saying goodbye is cruel. TAT'S IT!!! i jus starting crying all over again....wat e hell was i tinking?!?! tt's a hint rite there!!! i saw it 2 days ago n i din realise anythg wrong wif it?? wat is wrong wif mi???!! my heart jus sank....
so here i m, sitting in tis damn cold empty house 7hrs away from home, typing wif my swollen eyes, writing all e bull....for wat? hoping to feel better? less guilty? less shitty?? i dunnoo.....i jus wanna go home....
my new beginning in sydney was happy but now tis new beginning is sad....one more regret added to my life.....
posted by tingting @ 7:14 PM
4 Comments:
hey girl.... dun be sad.
death is natural. take it easy ok?
my aunt died a sudden death too. but we gotta move on.....
*hugs* Karen... i know how you feel..
i got a bad news on Monday night also from my family and i cried cried cried like crazy.. i wasnt sad.. i was mostly angry.. anyway i know you want him to wait.. but everything happens for a reason.. be grateful at least you got a chance to know your gong gon lah... i never had any chance to know any of my granpas... only know my grandma.. and one passed away 7 years ago.. same case.. she was in a different city.. and i didnt get to see her for the last time cause i postponed my flight.. worse than yours girl.. i couldnt help imagining what would be different if i went earlier.. but yeah.. it's all in God's hands.. i know it's hard for you.. but we'll be here for you.. i know you might think there's noone to talk to.. everyone hasnt got the chance to know you better.. but give us chance.. we'll make you feel like home.. cheer up
Gal, cheer up ya. Such things are part and parcel of life. I think we just have to move on and look forward in life.
That was what happened when both of my grandfathers passed away one after another, just half a year difference in the same year.
Cheer up, remember to look forward in life, I am sure your grandfather wouldn't want you to be so sad over his departure too, right?
*hugZ*
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